Matthew 6:25-27
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?”
Here are the things I worry about lately:
CAREER
I genuinely enjoy working in information technology. I am not doing this trip because I’m burnt out and want a fresh start or am looking for an escape from this industry. I love my job and the people I work with. But I am afraid of losing my skills while I’m out on the field. There are some developers that will take their laptops with them even on vacation so they can always be learning/researching/practicing something so they stay sharp for their job.
However, I remember at my training camp back in 2017, Chris Scott, the route architect of the Expedition, challenged my squad to bring only one small backpack. At the time I had already made up my mind to vlog the journey so I knew I wouldn’t be able to commit to that challenge then. But now that I am going back out for three months as a leader, I’m up for it. But this means I probably won’t bring a laptop to keep up on the latest and greatest in technology in the world.
TRUTH
Maybe I’ll lose my edge, but is He worth it? A resounding yes!
Perhaps I’ll even find an opportunity to use my skills to help a ministry we come into contact with.
But even if there isn’t, I know God isn’t worried. He sees, knows, and understands. Whether it turns out like I thought it would or not, I know He will be with me. He will provide.
RETURNING HOME
I warned my Racers at training camp that when they applied, when they were at training camp, month three on the field, and month eleven, people will consistently be asking them one question: What are you going to do when you come back?
This became a point of angst for me because who even knows, right? Do you know what or where you will be in a year?
No, because none of us are God.
Proverbs 16:9
“We can make our plans, but the LORD determines our steps.”
Even now I wrestle with depression and loneliness after returning home from Training Camp. But I know that greater things are coming. I won’t stay down long.
But what about after three months? My heart breaks thinking about it…
TRUTH
I don’t need to have it all figured out right now. I have some ideas, but we will see what opportunities the LORD introduces on the journey. Maybe some unexpected will turn up.
He knows my heart. He knows my needs and wounds. He will provide.
FUNDRAISING
I am doing a t-shirt fundraiser! Woo!
However, if you would rather donate you can do that here at my blog.
Note: gifts given on the blog are tax-deductible, but not the shirt purchase.
This is the shirt I designed:
You can buy it here: https://www.bonfire.com/serpent-crusher-heidi-gray/
I designed this shirt based on Genesis 3:15 and Psalm 91:13. My goal is to sell at least 100!
If you want to know more or know of any opportunity where I could share about my trip, the heart behind it, and what we will be doing, please reach out to me.
I’d love to share whether in person or on Zoom and let people know there is an opportunity to support missions even during Covid!
TRUTH
At the end of the day whether you give or not, God will be glorified. I want to be a part of what He is doing in the world and give people an opportunity to participate with me.
But even if you don’t give, I know He will provide. 🙂
Thank you for reading and your support.
Please share on social media. I don’t have Facebook, but if you do that would help me out. 🙂
May you be with God in spirit and in truth. <3
AWESOME DESIGN! You got thus, and He’s got you!
“But he knows the way that I take; when he has tried me, I shall come out as gold.”
??Job? ?23:10? ?ESV??
Love it Heidi! If you can match you as a wordsmith in your creative and substantive way with words. Like job, sometimes we don’t know the why’s and the Where’s , the how’s and the what’s,
But we know his character is above reproach and he’s a good good father who is always seeking our highest good and wants us to be used by Him more than we want to be used by him ourselves.
So like job, he was satisfied with knowing that God saw him and heard him and that he was for him ultimately.
“Without faith it is impossible to please God, for he who comes to God must believe that HE IS, and that he is a rewarder of those who diligently seek him. “
Your faith is stirring and challenging many Heidi, and is so sweet and pleasing to your father. Proud of you.
I’ll get Kathy working on getting me a double X T-shirt 🙂
Amen!
I’ve just started reading Job so I feel your comment is definitely aligned with where I’m trying to be.
Thank you, Matt! 🙂
Thank you, Kitty!
Heidi! As always I am so proud of the work you do. You needed to know how much you have been on my mind lately. More than usual! This must be why! You’re amazing and it was so nice to see this. I hope we can catch up soon!
dear sweet Heidi, I love you. And I’m so thankful you’re in my life now. I keep thinking about, “but is He worth it? A resounding yes!” What a great reminder when we feel down, worried, etc. because this is all for Him. Thanks for sharing your heart.